Checking Out

woman on grassHave you ever felt like checking out of your day to day life for a time? I got to be honest, I have been on an emotional roller coaster ride that had me doing just that for the past couple of months.

I am here physically but not necessarily living in the moment.

After losing my mom last year, and dad this past August, I am in somewhat of a fog. The world is a little more empty without them and they are certainly missed.

CHECKING OUT IS NOT ALWAYS THE ANSWER…

Life at times can be rough, however looking for options to gratify your soul, to make you feel whole again is best.

I have to think about moving forward in order to shake that feeling of loss because as you know life goes on…

If you’ve ever been in my shoes you know exactly how I feel.  If you’re just going through the motion of everyday and not really enjoying your life, you’re really not living.

Nevertheless I’ve been contemplating different ways I can shake the feeling of just wanting to check out for a time because now I think I’m ready to move forward.

But how do I go about moving on when my mind wants to go elsewhere?

So I started listening to mindful meditation. At the beginning for 5 minutes then increasing the time as I mastered each time limit. It helps relax my mind and allows me to focus.

If you’re anything like me, as soon as I get up in the morning, my mind is on any and everything. It’s off to the races of what needs to be done that day and beyond.

This means of course I am not living in the moment. So, meditation definitely helps me  become more focused and in touch with living in the moment.

I also started listening to uplifting christian music which gets my day going in a more positive direction.

It certainly helps lift my spirit from gloom to more optimism knowing no matter what I face God is near.  I have to keep moving forward regardless of life’s pauses and trials.

Finding an oulet

But what I have found recently to really help me find my footing again is a book titled writing down your soul by Janet Conner.

Her book is about activating and listening to a voice within as you write truth about your hurts and pains. You have to learn to listen closely while writing down your soul.

I haven’t really been excited about reading a book for a long time. But this one has me captivated because of what the writer is asking you to do.

It may be this is exactly what I needed at this point of my life. I find myself writing in my journal pouring my heart out while I bleed my thoughts all over the pages.

I needed to find an outlet to express my grief and feelings that was hard to express to even the closest of friends.

This book which has been sitting on my bookshelf for quite some time was just what I needed.

I am taking my time to read it as I digest and hang on every word of this writer.

“Writing down your soul” is about really learning to listen to the voice that resides within as you write down the things in your heart that’s been hidden.

I find myself writing everyday to this voice within bearing my sadness and pain. I have also gone deeper by sharing experiences in my life which were buried all these years that I have now come to terms with….

If you are going through mind blowing decisions, life’s frustrations and pains, I recommend this book. I guarantee you will not be disappointed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dear Lord

photo-1474505249622-84b542980263Every time I think you’re missing in action, you show me you’re always near.

You’ve been there through every laughter

You’ve been there through every tear

You’ve been there through my pain in the darkness

You’ve been there even when it rains

You’ve been there when my world was crumbling

You’ve been there through my saddest moments

You’ve been there through my mistakes and failures

You’ve been there when I felt so alone

You’ve been there when I suffered loss

You’ve been there when I searched for life’s meaning

You’ve been there when I was looking for love

You’ve also been there in my happiest moments

And you will still be there even after I’m gone

You turn my darkness into daylight and I can see more clearly your hands is in everythingYour love is eternal…..

 

THANK YOU LORD…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Behind the Veil

yuris-alhumaydy-660577-unsplash5665312828898458491.jpgLife goes on regardless of the difficult moments we endure

So don’t wallow in self pity

Don’t hide your face behind the veil of your sunshine.

Shed the darkness, the disorder, the confusion of your mind which is entangled in a nest of depressive thoughts which robs you of the beauty of life.

The fire, passions which resides within is contained yet yearning to break forth.

However it is quelched, subdued by the moods which seek to keep you suppressed and feeding off of the darkness that hides within the crevices of your mind.

Scream out, break free of the dark clouds which keeps you in a state of despair.

Climb out of the shadows which keeps you in a perpetual state of decay where you’re fighting for your very soul.

Dreading each day due to the heaviness which consumes your time and keeps you awake at night.

After the dark of night is daylight bursting forth to feed your very soul. It’s a new day full of countless possibilities.

Don’t get caught up in the rat race, trapped in a sea of forgetfulness.

Lost in a maze, fighting to escape everyday life.

Get out from hiding behind the veil in that zombie like state…

Life has meaning..

Seek and you will find your sense of belonging,

There is more to life than you are allowing in at the present.

Peace and happiness will arrive at your doorstep if you let go of the past and move on to the future.

Time will set you free….

 

 

 

 

Refreshing your New Years Resolution

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Do you know where you’re going to? Do you like the things that life is showing you? Where are you going to.. do you know?

That was the theme song from the movie Mahogany starring Diana Ross and Billy Dee Williams written several years ago. It’s still relevant even today.

When Diana Ross sang that song, I was hooked and I began to ask my younger self some of these serious life questions.

You might as well say it motivated me to change the course of my life.

Now that my kids are grown, and life is moving in another direction, I’m beginning to ask myself the same hard questions.
Do you know where you’re going to? Do you like the things that life is showing you? Where are you going to..Do you know?

Refreshing your Resolutions

What is it about the New Year which gets us all so excited?

A New year prepares our hearts and minds to rethink the past year and to make new changes for the coming year.

The old year is gone with whatever positive or negative experiences we had along the way. It’s time to wake up and be optimistic about a better and brighter future.

We pray and believe this is the year our life is going to change. For a very small percentage of people, with a real sense of purpose, they go from being a caterpillar into a butterfly.

Statistically speaking, 97% of the population make New Years Resolutions and never follow through on their intended goals.
Why do we even bother making resolutions of we don’t intend to keep it?

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It’s like running a race. Ready, Set, Go! In the beginning of the year we’re so excited to make changes. Somewhere between the starting and finish line, our goals begin to fade.

I understand because I’ve also been down that road many times and I’ve made some progress. Honestly, I’m still not where I would like to be because I’m still working on my dream.

I’ll tell you something else you already know…

Life will never change unless you decide to make a change. It’s much easier to give up rather than to keep going.

Year after year, you may find yourself in the same place you were the year before. Your New Years resolution may look like this.

1. Lose weight

2. Exercise…Join a Gym

3. Start a Business

This is merely an example, however ask yourself this question. How did my life change in 2018? What worked or didn’t work?
How can I challenge myself to get to the finish line?
It’s time to refresh your resolutions and make the necessary changes in order to succeed.

  • Keep it simple…A long list of resolutions overwhelms one state of mind. So therefore keep it short and simple.
  • Setting goals…break your 2-3 goals into workable small steps. Taking smaller steps will keep you on track. For example, if you intend on losing 50lbs this year, don’t try to do it all at once. Try 1lb a week which is workable. There are 52 weeks in a year. Even with some cheating you are sure on your way to completing your goal. Worst case scenario you lose 25lbs, but it’s still an accomplishment.
  • Day timer…Make a schedule of your goals along with your usual daily routine in the same book. This will allow you to keep a good balance between home and your personal goals without over extending yourself.
  • Be consistent…Follow through and be consistent in your actions. If you start one day and continue a month later or not at all, that will set you back. You will find yourself struggling to start again and you might quit in the process. Think about how many people sign up for a gym memberships and quit within a very short period of time. Consistency is the key to making progress that drives and motivates you to completing your goal. It’s like driving a car, if you don’t put your foot on the gas pedal, the car isn’t going anywhere.
  • Permission…Give yourself permission to skip days in between without feeling guilty. That’s your treat and cheat day. Then stay on track. The main thing is that you don’t give up and you hold on in order to accomplish your goal.
  • Visualize…See yourself finishing your race and all the perks that will come with it whether its financial freedom, free time or a great vacation.
  • The sky is the limit… This is your year to move in the direction of your intended goals for your life. Stay on track and keep moving forward. I know it’s easier to give up rather than to keep going. Tell yourself by this time next year I will be……..
  • Take action…Refuse to stand still in the same place year after year. refresh revitalize, and restore your intended goals.

Don’t live your life adding to the pile of lost dreams for another year. I know you will succeed if you do not quit. I’m rooting for you as well as myself.. Yes we can!

Season Greetings

celebrate-2953723_640Open your heart and open your eyes, watch the beauty of the season with all its magic unfold. The month of December creeps in at the end of every year with holidays and holy days.

Some of us celebrate with Christmas trees, tinsel and decorations. Yet, depending on your culture, it’s a precious celebration of your holy day. Whatever it may be to you, may you enjoy the season. 

The Hustle and Bustle

The Hustle and bustle of finding the perfect gift can be daunting. Online purchases has made shopping more convenient for people with time constraints.

Skip the trip to the mall and use the precious time you have available to spend time with family  and friends. Sip on some hot chocolate while enjoying heart to heart conversations.

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Home sweet home

There is nothing like going home after work to a warm home decorated for the season. In December, the coolness of the season gives you such warmth and enthusiasm.

My favorite thing to do is to listen to Christmas songs  and watch the Christmas shows on the Hallmark channel while I snuggle under my special throw blanket. What a cozy feeling….

Season Greetings

I wish you all the best this season and I pray for blessings for you and your family. May God direct your path as you continue on your journey to 2019.

Remember the best gift does not come in a box. It comes from above from our God and it’s called love. Please share this gift with others who have less by giving from your heart. 

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Here is a toast to a wonderful Holiday of love, laughter and good times with friends and family. 

As a Christian I want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas…

 

 

Are you failing at life?

girl-3141445_1280Have you ever told yourself you’re not going to do something and you did it again?

Well that was me about a week ago. After watching several videos on animal cruelty, I woke up the next morning and informed my daughter that mom has decided to be a vegetarian.

For several weeks I initiated and consumed a primarily vegetarian diet. I also included some seafood and watched cooking videos using vegetables in an array of dishes.

I have to admit, I was on my way to being a full-fledged vegetarian. Then hunger striked me when I least expected it.

I went to the mall and only had a glass of water that morning. Time went by and I was fine. Then in a moments weakness, I strolled into Shake Shack all the while deceiving myself I would eat a Portobello mushroom sandwich.

As I got closer to the register the smell of the food drew me in closer and closer. Then, as I began to place my order….

OMG!😲 I did it again. I ordered a hamburger. Yikes..

This is not the first time but the second on my way to vegetarianism.

In a moments weakness, I crumbled. Not only did I eat that delicious hamburger that I sworn off, but I didn’t mention it to my daughter.

🤔It’s funny how guilty you feel after doing something you told yourself that you weren’t going to do for any reason.

My daughter was so proud of my committment that I didn’t want her to know I failed. Yet, I knew she would forgive me nevertheless.

Failing in life is a lesson

Failing at anything you try to do in your life is only a lesson waiting to be learned.

There is always a hidden message from these experiences. Learn it and move on..

Giving up on whatever quest you desire is not an option.

Dust yourself off, pick yourself up and begin again.

You can choose to get stronger or allow your weakness to defeat you.

Life is a battle

Life is a battle and if you want to win that battle, find a winning team that will help encourage you to keep moving forward.

In conclusion, I am not going to tell you that I may not fall prey in a moments weakness to anything I decide to do in my life.

We all fall short. That’s what life is all about, learning and developing into the person you desire to become.

However I’m going to keep running my race no matter what challenges I face until one day I’m successful in whatever I commit to do in this life.

My wish for you is that you never give up and keep striving. Don’t let your demons get the best of you where you allow life’s failures to say you are not good enough.

Believing you can succeed is only the beginning.🤗

“If at first you don’t succeed try try again.”