Let’s Talk

photo-1496096113680-63bcf8182576Some people like to hide their emotions and pretend everything is ok. Well everything in life is certainly not always wonderful…

I thought this year was going to be different but it feels like an extension of last year. For the first time in years, I didn’t write my New Years resolutions for 2018. I haven’t had enough time to reflect on all the recent changes in my life.

Have you ever felt like running away from your life?

clem-onojeghuo-477553.jpgI know most of us would never admit it, but there are times when life seems to get the best of us and we are at our wits end.

It’s good to be honest with ourselves and find a way to deal with these intense emotions. Otherwise it can be like a fire. If we don’t try to extinguish it when it starts, it may spread to other parts of our life. Then we’re engulfed in a lot of flames or rather problems that may be too late to put out.

Haven’t you ever dreamt of being on an island, palm trees swaying in the wind, while relaxing on a hammock, enjoying the warm breeze as it sweeps across your face, while sipping on your favorite drink? Or maybe you have other dreams or desires that makes you feel good.

That sounds like heaven on earth. Peace and quiet is my ultimate  reward even for a brief moment in time.

There are many ways to deal with negative emotions when it suddenly creeps into your life. Running away is not always the answer. Finding creative solutions to the problem at hand will help you grow stronger and more well-rounded.

Since I can’t escape to an island at will, even though I would love the opportunity at any given time, I usually settle for using my imagination. I try to imagine the site, sounds and smells while relaxing and transcending my mind to another place.

I also write, write and write some more to be able to put those intense emotions on paper rather than leaving them in my mind to linger and show up another day..

If you don’t deal with what’s making you feel like running away even for a day, it may come back to haunt you on another day.

photo-1483884105135-c06ea81a7a80Admitting to these emotions doesn’t make you a weak person but it has the ability to make you stronger as you flush out these intensities in your life.

What are some creative  ways to deal with life’s bummers?








Wake up!


Wake up!  It’s more than time to give thanks and praise

to our God who helps us in all our ways.

The season of giving and receiving unfolds,

so let us relax, go forth and be bold.

This holiday comes at the end of each year

So let us shout for joy and be clear

Wake up

Remember it’s all about our Lord and those

really in need,

so let’s forget about ourselves, there’s

no time for greed.

We keep giving to people who have more

than enough, come on look around

do you really need all that stuff?

Shopping for presents is a yearly tradition

Wake up

It’s time to change this compulsive condition

Stressing and frustrated from all the rush

Spending money we don’t have

until we’re crushed

Wake up

Living paycheck to paycheck to pay all the bills,

believe me when I tell you this is no thrill.

At the end of the year when you think

you’re ahead, the Santa syndrome

Hits you hard on the head

Christmas music entices you to

shop till you drop

As you shop for the season and you

Just want to stop.

Our lives are not defined by how much

we have, but how much one gives to those

who are sad.

Wake up

It’s time to change our obvious response

to a life filled with desires and wants

time to change our conclusion

Get out of this illusion

Place a limit on your family and friend giving

So you can really start living

Stay alert find the charities who are truly

Reaching out

Make a switch, change your life

Remember what life is really about.


Pat Fagan












Letting go


Sometimes we hold onto people, and other things in our life so tightly making it very difficult to let go. We believe we are in control only to wake up to feelings of despair, pain and hopelessness.

Just imagine having a tug of war, with you holding onto a rope as tight as you can on one end and the stresses in your life on the other. Who do you think will win that war? At some point, you have to learn to let go. Otherwise the struggles you are carrying will take you down to a life of misery.

Continue reading “Letting go”

Beauty with a twist

sunset-2331736_1280I was looking forward to my much-needed vacation in Costa Rica in Central America. We had planned an itinerary which would allow us to visit different parts of the country.  There was so much more to see as we investigate the possibility of moving here when we reach retirement age.

Costa Rica

This country is beautiful with its exotic flowers, waterfalls and white and black sand beaches.  It has rugged terrain, volcanoes, and rainforests which is home to many animals. We arrived in San Jose and stayed at a hotel called the Barceló which I would recommend for its  view of the mountains, tropical gardens and great customer service. My husband and I have stayed here before and they are always more than willing to make your stay with them as comfortable as possible. Costa Rica is also known for its gourmet coffee beans considered among the finest in the world. I couldn’t wait to enjoy a cup at the Barcelos free breakfast buffet.

After leaving the hotel in San Jose, we traveled with some family and friends to places like Guancaste, Puerto Limon, and Cahuita. We saw volcanoes, waterfalls and bathed in   natural hot water springs. There is also a nice hotel near the volcano called the Baldi with several layers of hot water springs which is a must if you ever visit Costa Rica. You will not be disappointed.

20170806_121625We stopped in Liberia and went fishing where I actually caught my first fish.  We saw a monkey as we stood on the beach going through the trees. We tried to get his attention and took some pictures. As we stood near the water, the same monkey saw our stuff on the log, came down from the tree with a group of his friends in order to grab our things. Luckily, we got to it just in time. That was one of the many highlights on my vacation.

20170813_201152Our next stop was Quepos where we experienced an outdoor market which featured fresh fruits, vegetables and souvenirs for tourists. The Beaches in Manuel Antonio near Quepos were very relaxing and the rough waters did not deter us from taking several dips. I was dying to take a chance ziplining across the landscape but maybe on my next trip to this beautiful country.

Silent Racism

I like to write about the good bad and ugly in life because that’s reality. You can’t have one without the other. There is no time like the present to express my thoughts about the racism which exists everywhere in our world. Costa Rica is not different in that regard because it’s simply glossed over or ignored. Voted as one of the best places for retirement, a tropical paradise, environmentally conscious Costa Rica has its share of problems like any other country.

I am an African-American woman with a Caribbean heritage. I like to observe various aspects of life no matter what country I visit. My husband speaks fluent spanish and therefore he was able to communicate with anyone he came in contact with. On several occasions as we got into a cab, during their conversation, the word Limon would be spoken by the cabby.  I do not speak the Language but I understood why they assumed he lived in Limon.  A Little annoyed, my curiosity got the best of me so I began to dig deeper.

Costa Rica has four small minority groups which are Blacks, mulattoes, Amerindians and Asians. About 8% of the population is of black African decent from 19th century Black Jamaicans. They are considered Afro-Costa Ricans. I understand it’s a small minority of the entire population. But a country which boasts of a high literacy rate, why haven’t these minorities assimilated more into the major population?

Does all black people live and work in Limon?

Why does every cabby assume we come from Limon? Is this a segregated country? While driving through different areas, I couldn’t help but notice very few Blacks in professional jobs or casually sitting enjoying the beaches or restaurants on the pacific side of the country. So I began to look at this issue a little more closely.

Puerto Limon

Limon is closer to the Caribbean Sea and considered one of the most pristine and lush regions of Costa Rica. It’s a very busy port town shipping products like bananas to different countries and welcomes hundreds of cruise ships each year. Limon is also one of the country’s most geographically diverse regions and features everything from mangrove wetlands to towering mountains.This province also has white-sand beaches which are lined with coconut trees. In spite of this, Limon remains as one of the least traveled regions in Costa Rica, allowing for exploration of untouched prehistoric rainforests and unmatched beauty compared with the rest of the country.

Many Afro Costa Ricans have made there homes here and continue to raise their families in the Caribbean culture. The minority population who live here are marginalized due to underlying racism. The Politicians have invested very little on this side of the country. Limon is considered off the beaten path and usually not recommended for Tourists. There are not many jobs here due to the lack of investment. However jobs like dock hands, truck drivers, and cargo hauler are few and far in between. What are the options for those who complete their education?

As I drove around the country I saw a considerable amount of investment on the pacific side. New roads, new shops and restaurants like Crate and Barrel, Starbucks P.F. Chang and more. Fast foods like Quiznos, Subways, Kentucky Fried Chicken, even McDonald’s has made its home here. There are large malls featuring all kinds of designer shoes and clothing. Yes, they even have food courts with Asian, American and Costa Rican cusine. Yet in Limon, very little investment is focused on this side of the country. In my opinion, that’s why I consider it silent racism because this exists in some capacity everywhere, even in the United States.

This country is clearly segregated with the majority of blacks living primarily on one side of the country which is underdeveloped and neglected. Our Taxi driver assumed we were from Limon because he knows that’s where black people primarily live. Although I can honestly admit a lack of knowledge about the politics of Costa Rica and why things are the way it is, there is clearly a disparity between the two sides of this country.

The struggle of Blacks in this country is very similar to other South American countries. I have not been treated unfairly here due to the color of my skin however I couldn’t help but look into the matter of race. Limon was the clincher and if I am considering Costa Rica as a possibility for my future home, all aspects of this country needed to be explored. An interesting article to read although written years is by a lady named Rosebell.

https://rosebellkagumire.com/2010/02/19/costa-rica-democracy-and-why-it-doesnt-mean-much-for-black-people-here/ . She goes a little more in-depth as to the problems and I’m not sure if much has changed based on my observations.

Race is a Factor all over the world even in a democratic country like Costa Rica. I hope the government will implement policies to change discrimination practices which marginalize minorities in their communities.

Costa Rica is  indeed a beautiful country and has the opportunity to make some much-needed changes in order to make their country more inclusive for all their inhabitants. We are living in a world that can only move forward when we become more accepting of others regardless of race or ethnicity.








Picking Pockets


picking pockets

We are all dependent to some degree

There are some people struggling to break free

Picking other people’s pockets to support their lifestyle

Using their money rather than your own meanwhile

You got paid, now you’re broke

Using every penny while you joked

Now you will continue to use other folks

You’re robbing Peter to pay Paul

And you will continue to fall

The things in life which really mattered, you ignored

While living on the edge because you were bored

Now the debt collector is ringing and knocking at your door

But guess what, now you’re poor

Simply put, it’s time to pay up

But now you’re holding an empty cup

Picking other people’s pockets

It’s a crying shame

If you keep up this lifestyle, you’ve lost the game

You see the game of life is a complicated one

So you can’t live your whole life, living on the run.

Learn to be independent so you can be free

It’s a fact of life that will help you to live more carefree.

Pat Fagan