Tears in Uncertain Times

Shot of a young businesswoman looking stressed out in an officeFilled with fear and confusion

Consumed by my thoughts of uncertain times

Searching for answers that would lead

To an awakening of truth

An outlet, an escape from the fear which grips my soul

When I remember the world that will be no more

Darkened into submission

Never the same as we move toward a reset

We are paralyzed by change 

Having no idea what’s coming next

I cry silently in the darkness for lost memories

Of what was and what will never be again

As we crash into a different world

Awakening to new technologies

Extremely concerned with the storms of tomorrow.

Pat Fagan

 

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Living in Fear

photo-1584474263418-b947971ef9dc (1)Bombarded by the daily news briefing and the constant barrage of information about the Coronavirus, we are being told to stay home.

Fear has gripped our nation while our streets and public places remain empty. Businesses are closed for fear of spreading the coronavirus.

We are no longer socially or physically active but deactivated from everything we know and loved about our lives.

We are connected by our devices which keeps us engaged for a period of time.

Jobs are being lost and our lives are on hold. Our ability to pay our bills is at a standstill.

The economies of the world are in a state of limbo. It remains uncertain as to the gravity of damage this quarantine would cause while affecting the future of jobs and companies ability to sustain their existence.

What we took for granted, our freedoms, were stripped away in a matter of months by a virus.

It has created a crisis which may take a considerable amount of time to get back to some semblance of normalcy.

This Pandemic which is making its way around our world from country to country does not care about race, ethnicity, or our cultural differences.

It is a deadly and silent killer that is treacherous, spreading quickly around the world.

People are living in fear without having any knowledge of when this will come to an end.

We are all currently on lockdown, in self quarantine in fear of getting the coronavirus.

“Stay Home” is our new directive by those who are leading the charge. Now we are told to wear masks when we go out and about which is a good idea.

So we hunker down, day after day, in isolation in fear of going outside even to the pharmacy or grocery store.

THE FEAR FACTOR

Am I concerned about getting the Coronavirus?

We all should be cautious… so I do what I can to avoid sickness.

I can’t tell you how many times I walk around my house wiping door knobs and everything in between.

One day goes into the next and after awhile you start questioning what day it is…

We are eating more for comfort in order to deal with our stress and anxieties.

When my job decided to put a considerable amount of workers on furlough, I realized that there is a strong possibility they may not rehire their workers if things continue to deteriorate.

I checked my weight recently. I almost had a heart attack when I got on the scale. In 2 weeks, I gained some extra pounds which was not necessarily on my agenda.

But I’ve come to my senses…. finally! I have decided to do something about it otherwise this body would be unrecognizable.

FEAR even for the bravest among us has temporarily stolen our lives.

I can’t say I blame for feeling like things are spinning out of control.

Someone very close to me was diagnosed with Covid 19. So I’ve been the caretaker for the last two weeks.

I got more concerned about the virus after seeing the numbers of cases in the world going up day after day.

It took 14 days before he showed any signs of improvement. He had the cough, fever and other symptoms. It was like the flu except more intense.

I am so thankful that he is feeling better.

Never give up on the power of prayer. Be strong and have faith.

Eat healthy and take your nutritional supplements like Vitamin C. It is not a cure but will help build up your immune system.

Not everyone will die from this virus, but many people will get sick while others will be asymptomatic.

I understand the fear people are feeling and their reluctance to go out for fear of bringing the virus back to their loved ones.

Are you currently living in fear?

With all the bad news reported daily,  we can’t help but feel like our world is falling apart.

I’m so drained by the amount of information we are supposed to disseminate in order to keep safe.

Have you come to grips with the health crisis?

I feel so overwhelmed by what’s going  that I can’t even think straight.

My life feels like it’s turned upside down and I am paralyzed  to a certain degree by fear.

It does not stop me from getting things done, but it’s constantly on my mind like a dark cloud which wont go away.

Fear of the unknown is powerful. Our world is in crisis. My fear is more connected to the future results of this pandemic on all our lives and entire social structure.

The impact on our children, friends, and family is enormous.

Before the coronavirus was even a byword, I was so optimistic about life.

But are we losing sight to what really matters?

Yes, there is alot going on and there is enough fear to keep us extremely anxious and distress.

Listening to the news all day everyday can keep us all in a state of despair.

My suggestion,  turn off the news channels, youtube videos and other sources which keeps you in a state of perpetual fear.

Find some creative ways to bring back a sense of normalcy into your homes.

Refrain from talking about it as much as possible especially around your children.

Watch some movies or find something else to do in order to keep distracted from our new reality.

Taking on a new project around your home is exactly what you need.

There are alot of people out there who are trying to bring smiles by connecting online through music, comedy and other creative activities to help others through this nightmare.

What really matters is our ability to stay home and spend some much needed time with our loved ones.

Get back to reconnecting in meaningful ways with those you care about. This is the real meaning of life, building relationships.

We can’t control what life throws our way but we can choose how we react to it at any given time.

Fear dominates our landscape for the moment. But don’t let it rule the day. It wont last forever.

We are living in unprecedented times. This has never happened in the history of the world to this extent…

Hope conquers fear……..God is in control of it all.

 

 

 

 

I hate paying bills…

It’s like a disease that never goes away…

photo-1562240020-ce31ccb0fa7d (2)Friday’s are the best day of the week in my opinion.

I feel more free knowing the weekend is finally here and its time to do whatever I choose without rushing the day.

It’s also pay day…Yeah!!!

Now we can all pay those Pesty bills that’s like a bee always buzzing around our ears.

The majority of us live paycheck to paycheck.

We are blessed when we can afford to pay those bills.

Why has this become most peoples reality?

I believe because salaries have not gone up significantly since the 70’s in order to keep up with inflation. Housing expenses has gone through the roof, as well as other factors.

Why do I hate paying bills?

It’s like having another job…I do it, but I don’t have to like it.

Also to be quite frank,  it’s the process. It can be very stressful if it’s hard to make ends meet.

I remember seeing my mother as a child being inundated with mail. I didn’t understand it, but now its quite clear 99% were Bills.

My mother use to say in her time, paying Bill’s when she sat down to do so was like borrowing from Peter to pay Paul. In my home it was a juggling act while mom was trying to raise nine kids.

All her life, I remember her being surrounded by paperwork. Every day the mail came in, it piled up until she was able to get to it.

So it left a negative impact on my mind that I carry to this day.

Maybe that’s why I resent it. It consumed alot of her time.

Paying  bills is so intertwined in all our lives that we can’t help but hate it if there is not enough income coming in to satisfy the creditors.

We are all swimming in a sea of debt…

You might say to yourself, I have no credit card debt but there’s always something that has to be paid.

Some of us are drowning in debt and have no emergency savings.

Think about it..

You may have to pay rent, a mortgage, car loan,  car insurance, student debt etc..

There is no escape unless you are rich. However even the rich have to pay bills but I guess there peace of mind comes from the fact they can afford it.

According to USA today most Americans are struggling to pay their bills every month. That’s including people who make $100,00 plus a year. Career Builder put’s the number at 78% of U.S.

I personally would rather spend my time doing other things than paying Bill’s.

It’s a sad state of affairs…even worst is our saving potential for emergency purposes. 

Money can be a downer if you don’t have enough of it..but its not everything.

Paying Bill’s can be a nightmare for some people, but remember, its a means to an end.

If you can afford to stay away from any kind of debt, do so for your peace of mind.

The less Bill’s that you have to pay, the less stress.

Make your weekends count. Forget the mess and enjoy the rest of your weekend.

 

 

 

Don’t forget to write

If you’ve never put pen to paper before, here is some reasons to start writing…

WRITING IS NOT JUST FOR PEOPLE WHO ARE WRITERS, BLOGGERS OR AUTHORS…

brass black brown fountain pen
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

It’s for anyone who has something to say…

Writing down your thoughts on paper with a pen as you express your deep feelings is a great way to relax.

  • It improves your mood if you had a bad day.
  • Your stress level will decrease as you pour out your concerns on the page.
  • What a wonderful way to meditate without the usual methods.
  • Helps with depression and anxiety.
  • It will allow you to focus and see life more clearly.
  • This is your quiet time which allows you to be calm.
  • When you are angry…write it’s a great way to find some relief.
  • It encourages us to be more creative.
  • Writing is also influential on how we think.

Every situation you find yourself in gives you an opportunity to write. It’s therapeutic and can lead to a more positive outlook on life.

Nancy Olson, a Forbes life writer confirmed writing by hand is a powerful tool for learning. It also increases neural activity in certain sections of the brain.

When I had to study in college, the only way I would remember anything was to write it down.

For some reason my brain connected more to the information when I actually took the time to write rather than just using memorization.

Amazingly after all these years, this is my go to skill if I need to learn anything.

Try it! It actually works because you are not only using your brain, you are using your writing to remember the information.

I have been writing by hand for many years and I can definitely attest to the fact that it’s very rewarding.

Do you remember when people actually wrote letters to one another?

It may be you were to young to remember or it didn’t happen in your time.

It was a time of innocence meaning we did not have the technology that’s available today.

People who wanted to communicate in a meaningful way to friends, family or lovers, wrote and mailed letters.

We wrote, wrote and wrote some more and was very excited when we received a letter back in the mail.

Our hearts were on display in pen and ink and it felt good. We enjoyed the art of writing.

Of course if you received a bad letter, well you know what I mean…

Remember the movie Miracle on 34th street, the people wrote letters to Santa to get their point across to the Judge.

WHY DO WE WRITE?

So my point is this, writing is another way to express yourself. It is for anyone who wants to find another way to destress.

Don’t forget to write…

It’s not just for writers…Yes anyone who chooses can write.

Before getting out of bed to start my day, I find myself reaching for my journal to write about anything that concerns me

These past two years has been very trying and I am so thankful that writing has given me a way to say exactly what’s on my mind without being judged.

The ability to go deeper below the surface of my mind has given me time to examine my life while making positive changes.

It has been the most rewarding experience and helps me to relax before starting my day.

Our mind can become cluttered with thoughts we find very difficult to express with others.

But when you really allow yourself to let go by writing down your thoughts, its very liberating.

Hence the name, don’t forget to write because so many of us live our lives stuck in busyness.

We forget to take time to really get slow down and get to know who we are inside and out.

Taking time to open up to other possibilities and even finding answers to your most pressed questions could be found by allowing your mind to expand in another direction.

Writing might not be your thing, but its definitely a form of relaxation for those who would take the chance to explore it.

Even for the novice who is new to journaling, it will begin to change your life in more ways than one..

Writing is like meditation when you allow yourself to get lost in your thoughts, you would be surprised at what you learn.

By taking some time each day to write down your feelings, it will be very beneficial as you search within your soul for your life’s most pressing challenges.

IT’S VALENTINE’S DAY…WRITE A LOVE LETTER TO SOMEONE YOU LOVE. WATCH THEIR REACTION…

 

 

 

A Perfect Fit

photo-1491438590914-bc09fcaaf77aARE YOU STILL TRYING TO FIT IN?

Why do we torture ourselves this way?

When we were younger, I believe we all did it at some point to connect with our peers at school.

Somehow it continued to be a part of who we are in terms of forming friendship with others to be part of a group.

But there are times when we may not be a perfect fit and honestly, it’s okay…

Human beings always had a desire to fit in or find their tribe in order to feel whole. I guess it gave us a sense of belonging wherever we went.

For those who didn’t fit in they felt like loners or outsiders.

So fitting in has always been a big deal.

But as you grow older, wiser and more intuned with who you are as a person,  the need to fit in takes on a different meaning.

Being confident and accepting yourself is the first step to letting go of the tribal mentality.

You don’t always have to fit in, the key is to try to get along and build a good relationship with those you may come in contact with at home, work, or play.

A perfect fit is a misinterpretation of the reality of life.

None of us are truly perfect, but we are perfect for the friends, associates and family we interact with who accept us just as we are with all our warts.

Who cares about the people who has no real desire to connect.

You are better off leaving them alone because they will only make life more miserable.

Life is about building relationships with others whether family, friends or new people you may meet who has a genuine interest in you as a person.

WORKPLACE

We all know about the culture on the job and how we all try to fit in with our coworkers.

Sometimes it may be toxic and yet you may find coworkers you may connect with and have a sense of belonging…

Fitting in is not the answer to getting along at work. Building positive relationships is much more valuable.

My experience

I have been on my job for several years, and have met many people from all walks of life.

When I first started, I tried fitting into the work culture and personalities I met along the way.

Since it was a very competitive environment, people were very disengaged with anyone who they considered to be a threat of being a top producer.

I experienced that when their were people deliberately trying to sabotage my success.

So just imagine trying to be a perfect fit in that environment. It doesn’t work so the best way I coped with the situation was to continue to be the best version of myself.

I connected on so many levels with people who saw me as a valuable asset and we continue to maintain that relationship years later.

I also have a coworker on my job who in my opinion has trouble with others.. so I try to stay away from her as much as possible.

My clients tend to give me compliments and gifts. Her jealousy was very pervasive this year and she showed her true colors.

Her negative energy reminds me this is someone I need to stay away from as much as possible.

She obviously is not a perfect fit and we will not be able to connect on any level even though I’ve tried for several years.

My advice

In this short life we live in you have to find the people who will impact your life in a positive manner.

If you are trying to hard in order to be that perfect fit in a friendship or relationship with someone and you feel like you’re spinning your wheels and going nowhere give it up.

It’s not going to work with people who have bad attitudes or no real desire to connect.

Save your time for people that really matters…

Find people which will bring positive energy into the equation.

It doesn’t pay to waste your time trying to fit into relationships that just doesn’t work.

Simply put, it’s a waste of time…

Accept yourself for who you are, Find the people who sees your worth and there you will find the perfect fit for your life.

Just remember, none if us are perfect and trying to fit into scenarios that hurt us rather than help us is not smart.

Don’t torture yourself trying to fit into a situation that will make you unhappy.

You have to love yourself first,  accept yourself for who you are..

Only then will you be able to connect with others who you can build a real friendship and grow your relationship.